forgottenhistorystories_be7c5h
- Added insult to injury! , Entertainment
- January 27, 1302
- 6 views
DANTE OUT FOR REST OF SEASON IN LOSS TO BLACK GUELPHS
MVP SEASON ENDED January 27, 1302 Florence, Italy Dante Alighieri, star of the Florence White Guelphs and league MVP last year, is out for the season after sustaining an injury…
- A good whipping! , Royals
- June 2, 1879
- 6 views
ROYAL NAVY ABOLISHES FLOGGINGS
WISTFUL DUKE OF CAMBRIDGE SAYS ENGLAND GETTING SOFT June 30, 1879 London The Duke of Cambridge, England’s top general, can’t believe the news: the Royal Navy has decided to stop…
- Celebrities , Crackpot!
- June 22, 1633
- 9 views
GALILEO APOLOGIZES FOR SILLY THEORY
EARTH-AND-SUN THING A MISUNDERSTANDING June 22, 1633 Rome Scientific instrument salesman and part-time professor Galileo Galilei has a hard time keeping his opinions to himself. We can’t quite blame him.…
- Creep! , Latest News
- February 2, 1118
- 9 views
PREDATOR TEACHER ABELARD CASTRATED BY SCHOOLGIRL’S UNCLE
DAUGHTERS SAFE NOW 1118 A.D. Paris, France Let this be a lesson to fathers all over Paris. Don’t allow your daughters to be tutored by philosophers. The well-respected canon, Fulbert,…
- Royals , She loves badboys!
- February 20, 0449
- 12 views
PRINCESS HONORIA IN LOVE WITH ATTILA THE HUN; PLANS TO ELOPE
A MOTHER’S WORST NIGHTMARE 449 A.D. Ravenna, Italy Attila, the fearsome leader of the dreaded Huns, isn’t content with land and tribute. He wants the princess for his bride. And…
- Royals , Trustfund brat!
- January 1, 0560
- 11 views
SPOILED CROESUS SELLS DADDY’S COIN COLLECTION
HOCKS EVERYTHING TO PAY FOR PARTYING 560 B.C. Sardis, Lydia Kids these days. You just can’t give them anything nice. King Alyattes, when he wasn’t running the country, worked his…
- Celebrities , Women, stay in the kitchen!
- February 18, 0106
- 12 views
BAN ZHAO SETS BACK WOMENS RIGHTS WITH NEW BOOK
OUTDATED CONFUCIAN IDEAS 106 A.D. Luoyang, China Ban Zhao, the feminist hero who once championed the teaching of girls, has set back women’s rights a thousand years. Worse, she has…
- Bad mother-in-law! , Latest News
- April 12, 1945
- 21 views
TRUMAN INAUGURATED, MOTHER-IN-LAW NOT IMPRESSED
STILL THINKS HE’S A FAILURE April 12, 1945 7:09 P.M. The Cabinet Room of the White House Washington, D.C. Harry Truman was sworn in as the 33rd President of the…
- Everybody hates him! , Latest News
- January 11, 1893
- 20 views
SUPREME COURT KILLS TROUBLEMAKER GENERAL BENJAMIN BUTLER
NINE LIKELY SUSPECTS January 11, 1893 Washington, D.C. Someone has finally killed Ben Butler. The Rebels of New Orleans couldn’t do it; the Brahmins of Boston couldn’t do it; Confederate…
- Disinherited! , Latest News
- June 6, 1976
- 20 views
BILLIONAIRE RECLUSE J. PAUL GETTY WILLS FORTUNE TO MALIBU LOVE CHILD
LEGITIMATE CHILDREN FURIOUS June 6, 1976 Sutton Place, England Jean Paul Getty, playboy billionaire, has died, and none of his legitimate children are getting his money. He’s left his vast…